You'll Hate Me
by Keleficent
Summary: Mabel feels guilty about her role in starting Weirdmageddon.


The Pines family looked so cute sleeping together. Ford was holding on to Stan, and Stan had his arm wrapped around Dipper who was tucked in between them. There was a space next to Dipper where Mabel had been laying. But Mabel had given up trying to sleep.

They had set up mattresses so they could sleep in the living room. Their excuse was the shack still needed repairs and their bedrooms may not be safe from the elements. But all of them knew it was really for the peace of mind of being together.

Unfortunately, even having the three people she loved most in the world by her side wasn't enough to put her at ease.

She opted instead to walk around the shack. They had done a pretty good job making it livable again. Mabel, of course, had been nothing but smiles and optimism as they rebuilt the ruined shack as well as rebuilt Stan's ruined mind.

She thought she would have no problem navigating through the dark shack. It was so familiar to her now, like home. But the damage caused by Weirdmageddon put a lot of things out of place, and she bumped into a misaligned shelf and knocked over a snow globe.

One week ago, breaking a snow globe wouldn't have been a big deal. Stan would half-heartedly threaten to make her pay for it until she gave him the puppy-dog eyes to convince him that he couldn't stay mad at his pumpkin.

But everything was different now. She didn't see the snow globe break; she saw the rift shattering to pieces. She saw Blendin's eyes turn yellow and heard Bill's ear-piercing laugh echo through the trees as the world around her fell apart.

Suddenly, Mabel couldn't breathe. She collapsed to the ground. No matter how big a gulp she tried to take, it wasn't enough air. It hurt. It hurt so bad. Was she dying? Maybe this was God punishing her. Maybe she should just lay down and accept her punishment.

"Di-" But she was scared. "Dip-" She didn't want to die alone. "Dipper-" She wheezed out her brother's name. "Dipper!"

On cue, Dipper appeared. She wasn't sure how he heard her raspy call, but somehow, he was always there when she needed him.

"Mabel? Mabel, are you okay?" Dipper knelt by his sister and put his hand on her shoulders. He didn't know what to do, so he did the only thing a frightened child would think of: he called for the nearest adults. "Grunkle Stan! Grunkle Ford!"

Barely a few seconds passed before their elderly uncles appeared.

"Get away from the kids!" Ford had his gun out looking for whatever target he needed to aim for.

"Who's there? I'll bash your brains in!" Stan had his brass knuckles out ready for a fight.

"Grunkle Stan, Grunkle Ford, something's wrong with Mabel."

Stan looked down at his niece struggling to breathe. "What happened?"

"I don't know. I just found her like this."

"Mabel, what's going on?" Stan went over to Mabel and put his hand on her back. Mabel couldn't or wouldn't answer him. His mind was still a little fuzzy and ill-equipped to handle an emergency. "I'm calling an ambulance."

"No, she doesn't need an ambulance." Ford recognized what was happening immediately. He sat behind Mabel and pulled her head into his lap. "Mabel, calm down. You're having a panic attack. I know it must be scary for you, but I promise your life isn't in danger. We'll help you work through it, okay?"

Ford's calming voice did nothing to slow her breathing. He knew from experience that panic attacks did not end so easily. "Stan, get a cold washcloth. Dipper, get her some water."

Stan and Dipper were uncertain but decided to trust Ford and left to obey his instructions.

"Mabel, sweetheart, give me your hand." She obeyed Ford's request and gripped his hand. He kissed her hand before wrapping his twelve fingers around it.

Stan and Dipper came back with the washcloth and water. Stan handed Ford the washcloth to place on Mabel's forehead. Dipper held on to the glass until Mabel was ready to drink.

"Take deep breaths, sweetheart." Ford stroked her hair hoping it would comfort her. "Relax, it's okay. You're okay."

Mabel was finally able to whisper out some words. "I'm sorry."

"For what, dear?"

"It's all my…my fault."

"What's your fault, pumpkin?" Stan asked.

"I…I can't tell you. You'll…you'll hate me."

"Mabel, don't be ridiculous. We could never hate you," said Dipper. "Please, Mabel, tell us what's wrong."

"Weird…Weirdmageddon was my fault. The rift…"

"Mabel, dear, that was an accident," said Ford. "It's not your fault that it broke. You had no idea what you had."

"But…but it wasn't an accident. I…I gave it to him. Bill possessed Blendin. I thought it was really him. And he said…he said he'd give me a little more summer if I gave him the rift."

"Mabel, we're not gonna hate you for that," said Dipper. "Bill tricked you. Just like he tricked me. And he tricked Grunkle Ford too."

"But it's still my fault. It's my fault Grunkle Ford got hurt by Bill. It's my fault Grunkle Stan lost his memory. It's all my fault."

She had wanted to hide in her bubble, abandoning the ones she loved just to avoid the consequences of her actions. She left Dipper all alone, she left Ford at Bill's mercy, and she left Stan to worry about her for days. They had been willing to sacrifice everything to stop Bill. And to protect her. And for what: a selfish brat who ruined everything?

Her hyperventilating became worse. Even though it hurt a lot, she had no right to complain. She deserved this. She deserved to suffer.

"Grunkle Ford, are you sure she doesn't need a doctor?" Dipper was trying to keep calm, but his sister's worsening state was scaring him.

"No, she doesn't need a doctor."

"Ford, she looks like she's gonna die!" said Stan.

"Stanley, don't frighten her!"

"It's okay…Grunkle Stan…it's okay…if I do. I deserve to…I deserve to die."

"Oh god, Mabel, don't say that." Dipper teared up hearing his sister say such a horrible thing.

"I do…I deserve to die." It hurt Mabel to talk, but she didn't care. It was like a confession. She needed to repent.

"Mabel, don't…please. We love you. We love you so much," Stan pleaded in an agonized voice.

They loved her. Even after she told them what a horrible person she was, they still loved her. She didn't deserve them. "I'm...I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

"Mabel, stop. Just stop, sweetheart, please." Ford held back his tears. The last thing Mabel needed was for him to lose control as well. "Take deep breaths and listen to me, okay?" Ford took the cloth from Mabel's forehead and used it to wipe the tears off her cheeks. "You do not deserve to die, Mabel Pines. You're one of the kindest souls I've ever known. You've brought me so much joy since I've known you."

"Ford's right, kiddo. You're a good girl. You made me smile more these last few months than I have in my whole life."

"R…really?"

"Yes, really, pumpkin." Stan tenderly brushed some hair off her face.

"Mabel…" It was Dipper's turn. "You're more than just my sister; you're my best friend. I'd be lost without you."

"But…but I'm a bad sister. I'm selfish."

"That's not true, Mabel. You made a mistake and you're sorry for it. You escaped your bubble just to come back with me. You were going to let me take Ford's apprenticeship if I wanted. You stayed by my side even when Bill was trying to kill us. You came through for me in the end like you always do."

Mabel's breathing finally started to slow down. "But none of that would have happened if it weren't for me."

"Weirdmageddon was not your fault, Mabel," said Ford. "The blame lies entirely with me. I shouldn't have built the portal, I shouldn't have kept the information about the rift from you, I shouldn't have tried to separate you and Dipper."

Mabel's breathing finally returned to a somewhat normal pace.

"Please don't feel guilty for my mistakes, Mabel. It's just one more thing I'll have to blame myself for."

"I don't want you to blame yourself either, Grunkle Ford." Mabel was finally able to sit up. She turned around to give Ford a faint smile. "Maybe we could just blame Bill?"

"I think that's a fair compromise." Ford pulled Mabel in for a hug. It wasn't long before Dipper and Stan joined in as well.

Dipper broke the hug to give Mabel her the glass of water. "Feeling better, Mabel?"

"Yeah, thanks." She accepted the water a took a huge sip.

"Good," said Stan. "But don't you ever say you deserve to die or nothing ridiculous like that again."

"Yes, Grunkle Stan." Mabel smiled as he ruffled her hair.

The four Pines headed back to the living room. Mabel laid down first. Dipper laid by her side and snuggled close to her. She nestled her head under Dipper's chin. A larger arm from behind Dipper wrapped around the both of them. She could feel the hand rubbing her back had six fingers. One more body laid down behind her, and she immediately got a whiff of Grunkle Stan's weird old man smell. It was a scent that meant safety and home to her.

For the first time since the rift broke, Mabel felt at peace.


End file.
